Tag: Relationships

Sunshine

If you feel like the sunshine

wrap your arms around yourself and

feel the warmth of love

Float free

Float free!

That’s the dream.

But the chains are embedded in the skin.

Anguish

Take that anguish out

Nothing then remains..

The anguish that has been nurtured,

by the seemingly innocent fires blazing around

Just the empty shell of a human

adorns the dreary land

Dealing with the lack of sleep

Not getting sleep is a common problem with lot of people. In my opinion, many times it is because mostly people do not value sleep and just expect it to happen as soon as they decide to sleep. In fact sleep is much more important than most of the things that you give your attention to. Insomnia if too regular, is treated as a disease and once a person gets into the pattern of popping pills to get the much coveted sleep, the cycle of other associated issues start.

The humans of twenty-first century are burdened with the power of brains and the brains are exhausted because of the acute pressure they feel from the information that the overworked eyes, ears and other sensory organs pump into them. Once upon a time people used to cook and eat their dinner while the sun used to go down and then the time for bedtime rituals used to take over. For children the stories narrated by their elders and for adults the warmth of relationships used to work wonders. People used to wake up with the first rays of the sun. Life was easy with the eyes, ears, brains and hearts- all content and ready for the day! Such routines were only disrupted by grief, loss etc. To deal with those setbacks, there used to be the shoulders of the kin to cry on and let out the steam.

Today’s humans are extremely sophisticated beings, straight out of the sci fi novels. Their entire effort goes into conquering the emotions and let the brain take over all the matters of heart. We are trying to conquer the universe and the universes beyond it. There is no respite for anyone. Poor over-worked brain! It has to handle all those complicated stuff that the TV and the computer feed into it along with the myriad emotions stuffed in unrecognisable baggages from our daily lives. In such a scenario, sleep becomes a victim of the brain’s wrath, which does not let it sneak anywhere close to the eyes. After all eyes are the one which strained themselves to get to the brain all that the world had to offer…

How to sleep becomes an issue. Try the following to get 7-8 hours of sleep everyday, which is absolutely essential to stay sane in the long run.

  1. Cherish sleep! Give it the importance that it deserves.
  2. Each day should be like the one that you love the most. Take a few moments off from everything in the morning and count your blessings and take a pledge to make it the best day in your life. Enrich it with the experiences that you can manage. Even a smile for everyone you meet can work wonders or just lending a helping hand to someone who needs it.
  3. Wake up at the same time everyday, come what may, even on the weekends. Fill your day with effort, humour, exercises and cooperation. Rest will follow.
  4. Do not sit for more than half an hour altogether. Walk around wherever you are. Do not sleep in the day time though a power nap of a few minutes can be a good idea. But it should not be longer than 5- 15 minutes.
  5. Sip tea at regular intervals without any additive (milk/sugar). You will get used to the tea leaves brewed well. Coffee is equally helpful but without additives. Your last cup should be sipped by 5 pm. Beyond that, it is better to walk around, do yoga etc to calm your mind.
  6. A rejuvenating bath is relaxing after sunset. An early light dinner is great, just avoid eating too much. Do not let food sit on your chest, i.e, avoid heavy food.
  7. Going down of the sun should be accompanied with the dimming the lights at home. Beautiful lamp shades and soothing music help. Try piano or sitar music to create the atmosphere.
  8. Keep the volumes low when you communicate with other family members. Switch off the television and share your own stories with your loved ones and listen to theirs. Play music and dance if you feel like. As it is you know that all TV channels are paid by the vested interests and the information is mostly propaganda. If at all you need to ‘know’, read the newspapers in the morning. Check your tablet/ phone for the news but in the morning, not through the day, unless your job needs you to do so. Believe me, for most, checking newsfeed is an addiction.
  9. The brain needs to feel secure and relaxed to get into the sleep mode. Calm it with just following your breath and music. Mentally you should get off work and mundane family matters slowly, irrespective of however important they might seem. Transfer your burdens onto the shoulders of tomorrow. Release yourself, Time is the beast of burden, not you!
  10. Keep the screens off at least one hour before your designated bedtime. Take only those calls that are really important. Focus on your well being not on the issues of the world. Basically let the micros of your own life take precedence over the macros of your perceived realities that have crowded into our homes and bedrooms because of technology.
  11. Last but not the least, focus on your breath when you get into the bed. Getting into meditative state helps in sleeping.

The relationships that matter

Once in a while it makes sense to take a stock of our life. We are surely going to find some assets and a few liabilities in terms of our well being. More than happiness, well-being should be a more sought after goal since it ensures a good sleep at night. Some relationships which may have seemed to be rewarding and healthy at the outset might turn into worst nightmares or in milder form, irritants. Whereas a few relationships are like soothing warm fire burning bright in the heart. How to identify such soothing warm lights in our lives?

These soothing warm souls may go wherever, but they are bound to reappear in your life sooner or later. Many times they are already present but you just do not see or notice them and one fine day, you notice them or they present themselves and you are kind of totally overwhelmed with the feeling of well being, just because they are there. These positive people in your life are rare but they are there. They do not claim you, neither they disown you. A friend who keeps waiting for your message till late night, concerned whether you have reached home safe or not, or an erstwhile acquaintance who reappears in your life to fill some void that even you were not aware of; are some examples. They do not expect or reject. They are just present when they are or they are just not. Whatever is the case but they are not abrasive. These warm souls do not put you in the dock and judge you for whatever you are. Acceptance is the spark that lights the fire in their case. These relationships are ‘tough’. They endure! Such people live in our hearts. We remember them almost everyday yet we may not express because in our hearts we preserve them. These relationships are not dependent on words… a few are good enough to nurture them.

We humans are the bundles of energy and we impact each other profoundly. Connected we remain even if we do not believe so. Where your receptors reach and whom you receive in your heart is upto you. Most of the times you do not even need to reach out. Lights simply touch your soul inadvertently and brighten your life.